Lance Armstrong on the recieving end of legal trouble? Yes, it’s true. Of course, the proceedings are in Italy, so you can be certain that March 7, 2006 trial date is purely speculative. ProCycling states here that Amrstrong’s first legal manuever will be to try and change the trial location from Simeoni’s hometown of Latina, near Rome, although other evidence says Simeoni is actually from Milan. Whatever. I’ll let the lawyers figure that one out. Interestingly, if information comes out in the trial that proves Lance used illicit drugs (though with half the world trying to prove his guilt for some time now, you think it would have happened already), it could mark a new era in the way the American justice system prosecutes doping offenses. USATF would do well to take note.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a Vuelta. It’s posted here, complete with map, and features a fat five summit finishes. The Spanish Tour also has a mere 61k of TT in toto, perhaps in a show of solidarity with the other Grand Tour courses for next year, filling in the gap left by a hard man’s Giro and an “Ullrichfest” Tour. Distubringly, though, Liberty Seguros, the team that just lost the ’05 Vuelta title on a doping positive, has also lost its president to resignation. Manuel Pradera, who was the majority shareholder in the company that owns Liberty, cryptically cited “things I do not agree with and that I cannot change” (I really feel like that means “drugs”, but won’t go so far as to say it) as his reasons for departure, but promised that the team was in no danger of collapse.

Todd Yezefski has been many things. In his early days, he was a pudgy but suprisingly quick Junior track racer, who at least has a t-shirt from Junior Worlds. Once described as “Pantani on donuts,” Todd slimmed down while leading Dartmouth College to three consecutive national road titles. Since then, he’s plied his trade on roads and boards across the North American continent, all while somehow conducting research into something or other at the University of Chicago. A man of humor and words, Todd agreed to give us just a wee little bit of insight into what (kind of) being a pro racer is like.

Just because there’s no big news today, with the UCI and Grand Tours content to stop wailing on each other for the moment – though T-Mobile has a hilarious mistranslation on their homepage today (search “backfires”) – doesn’t mean there’s no interesting news. For example, Belgian Ludovic Capelle had his suspension recinded based on procedural errors in his EPO test. However, most people involved still agree that Capelle did have EPO in his system. As you might expect, all Belgium is quaking in fear about what the UCI, eager to reassert its authority, and Dick Pound, generally just an angry dude, get around to doing something about it. And, does this test still count as positive, since only the suspension was overturned? If it does, no ProTour squad should be able to sign him for the next four years; but with the ProTour no longer including the biggest races around, maybe it’s worth the risk to snap him up?

‘Alo. Je m’appelle Jacques-Yves Cosmo, and today I will be your guide as we travel today to zee Depths of Inanity, in zee heart of zee European cycling world. As there has been much hot air introduced into zis closed system, we must wear our pressure suits, for we have not zee thick skulls of zee beasts that inhabit zis place. Ah! Regard, our first specimen, UCIous hypocriticus, known more commonly as “Pat McQuaid.” Zis fine animal is newly evolved, having recently supplanted UCIous crusty-old-Belgicus, and is facing zee fierce competition from Grandtourus tyrannicus, long a competitor for zis tiny niche. Hypocriticus maintains in zis article that tyrannicus is motivated by greed, even while hypocriticus refuses to compensate teams zat race its events. Tyrannicus, meanwhile, apparently zinks zat because its races are very old and important, it, not hypocriticus, should decide which teams race in zem. C’est vrai, it is a truly vicious battle, with almost no impact on zee actual racing of bikes; thus, it is fought exclusively in zee Depths of Inanity.

Why not start with some results today, since I’ve been doing all this frothing at the mouth lately, yeah? Cyclocross Nations wrapped up today, with Katie “straight outta” Compton coming straight out of Colorado Springs to hand the Elite Women’s field it’s own backside on a platter. According the Live Report, this win was Compton’s first Elite Woman’s ‘cross race of the season, which is more than a little impressive, if not just a bit suspicious. Also, I’ll give a shout out to my former teammate Amy Wallace, who placed 9th; impressive considering she has a real job and everything. In the collegiate race (yesterday), which for some horrible reason only featured a Men’s race, Brent Bookwalter of Lees-McRae lapped all but 15 of the 50-some-odd competitors to take the win, before going on to snare 3rd in the u23 race later that same day. Not too shabby.

“At one point I literally broke down and started weeping,” US Cyclocross Nationals race organizer Richard Fries said, apparently overwhelmed by yesterday’s epic conditions. Richard, I have some news for you: there’s no crying in cyclocross. The whole idea of the sport is dealing with transitions, and molding the unexpected to your own iron will. If that means 60 minutes of jogging in a circle with the bike on your back, so be it. Rider safety should be the only concern that stops the ‘cross show, and the scenes of “carnage” described by Fries in this report hardly seem compelling. Hypothermia? At 34 degrees? Having competed in some ski events where the Chief of Race had to stuff the thermometer into his pants to get it to the -4° F (-20° C) “race legal” temp, I am extremely skeptical that these “hypothermia” cases demanded immediate attention. Other than that, the only major injury reported was a chainring wound to an “Achilles [sic] heel” (given the meaning of that phrase, I think VeloNews meant to say “Achilles’ tendon” or just plain “heel”), the sort of injury you could expect to find at any ‘cross event.

Back in August, I was looking to throw together a passable ‘cross bike from an old Kona Lava Dome. I had a good, 8 speed XT drive train together, but wanted drop bars and the ease integrated shifters/brake levers. OEM Shimano was hard to come by, Sora was unaccebtably poor, and Campy wouldn’t be compatable. But then I stumbled across these weird Italian things. Alleged to be both Shimano and Campy compatable, 100g lighter and (most importantly, for me) $100 less than the competition, these oddballs seemed worth the chance.

Yes, so I’m stuck in Williamstown, digging out from a modest snowfall and not going to ‘cross nationals. So sad. Mercifully, fortune has provided me with some interesting news to report: the Grand Tours (and their auxiliary events, such as Paris-Nice Liege-Bastogne-Liege, Paris-Roubaix, Milan-San Remo, Paris Tours and others) are officially out of the ’06 ProTour. What’s this mean? Well, as far as I can see, the death of the ProTour. With the departure of the Grand Tours, ProTour is now a watered down World Cup with short stage races. Before, it was (in my opinion) a poor criterion for selecting the year’s best rider (though DiLuca was hardly undeserving), and in ’06, lacking 6 of the most prestegious races on the calendar, it will be completely irrelevant. The departure also means that teams will once again be at the mercy of ASO, RCS and Unipublic for selection to the Grand Tours, meaning that we can expect more spiteful and nationalistic exclusions like the one ASO foisted upon Cipo’ from ’00-’03).

Yeah, you can’t help but be excited for something like US ‘cross Nats, especially located as it is in the bike mecca of anywhere within two hours of Boston, MA. The Friday forecast is looking like the Collegiate race, at least, will be interesting. Here’s the official page (note the Harpoon Beer Garden) for more details. As always, volunteers are needed. I’d say I’d be there, but transportation is becoming an issue (hugs to VTrans for not salting, plowing or sanding Route 9 during that last snowstorm – I mean, there’s what, two other East-West roads in VT, so why bother maintaining that one). Transportation, however, will not be an issue for the US Junior ‘cross sqaud, as the previously useless people at Dopers Suck have finally decided to try and improve cycling, rather than just talk about why it sucks (a more elaborate assesment of “the movement’s” shortcomings can be found here).