Cyclocosm - Pro Cycling Blog » Fun Stuff

The Pistolero Steakhouse T-Shirt

cosmo — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 13:44:49 +0000

I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of Norwegians telling me what to think.

Take Thor Hushovd getting his knickers in a twist because of the local support Alberto Contador has received since his positive dope test. Just because most of his fans are too busy being employed to flood into the streets is no reason for the reigning world champion to be bitter.

And then there’s the head of the Norwegian cycling federation saying that his counterparts in Spain won’t give Contador proper scrutiny. First, other nations haven’t exactly been stringent, and second, hasn’t dumping the blame for the world’s cycling problems on Spain gone out of style yet? McQuaid’s been on that gripe for almost four years now.

Well, now’s your time to fight back against over-reaching “Anglo-Saxons” (to borrow McQuaid’s terminology). As you may or may not know, Contador is turning the media attention surrounding his misfortune into positive marketing by opening chain of upscale restaurants, and Cyclocosm has been chosen as the exclusive US distributor of their promotional apparel.

So this morning, I am proud to offer you your first opportunity at buying the official Pistolero Steakhouse t-shirt. It’s printed on an American Apparel tee, and I’ve switched printing methods to something a little more flexible and breathable than the previous designs.

ALL YOUR BIKE ARE BELONG TO US

cosmo — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 14:06:53 +0000

There was something eerily familiar about the suddenness which with Cervelo Test Team’s and Garmin-Transitions’ fortunes changed just before the Vuelta. The sneak attack, the telegraphic language in the press releases, and the valiant counter-strike—like something from a half-remembered dream in my Internet Youth.

Contains graphic elements possibly inspired by works from Flickr user Nathalie 05, ZumaPress, Picasa user Jonathan S, Sirotti, John Pierce, Cervelo’s website, and of course, Zero Wing

[background information, if this makes no sense]

Team RadioShack Race Radio Redub

cosmo — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 14:05:51 +0000

This isn’t my best work, but considering the source material—audio from the Nike US Postal documentary The Road To Paris, an old RadioShack mobile phone ad from 1990, and a brief clip from Floyd Landis’ Nighline interview—it’s not too awful.

I’d hoped to scrape some more goodies from The Lance Chronicles, but Floyd and the radios just don’t come up all that much.

Some blame should also go to @mmmaiko for coming up with the idea (kinda).

How The Race Was Won – 2010 Tour de France, Stage 11

cosmo — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 13:53:14 +0000

Obviously I couldn’t keep off this one—not the way the Internet exploded following Renshaw’s ejection. It wasn’t entirely an otherwise unremarkable stage, but most of this focuses on the final few meters.

[click for iPad/iPhone/downloadable version]

[Contains, in order of appearance, footage from Eurosport, Versus and NOS, and still photos from Graham Watson, Pascal Pavan, Eric Gaillard, Lauren Rebours and Fotoreporter Sirotti.]

I said almost immediately—and have the audio to prove it—that I thought Renshaw would get relegated for closing the gate, but I think the race jury wanted some way of punishing Cavendish for the actions of his leadout man, and so bumped Renshaw from the race. The Aussie’s been fantastic all Tour long—it’ll be interesting to see how things shake out without him.

No shortage of opinion on this one, ranging from no sanction should be given to no headbutting should be allowed ever in any sport. I obviously think I’m right, but please don’t feel bound to defer to my feelings on the subject. Versus did a great job of getting reaction interviews moments after the finish: here’s Dean, Farrar, and Renshaw.

Yo Dawg, Heard You Like Neutral Finishes

cosmo — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 17:36:31 +0000

(click through for something resembling an explanation)

No related posts.

How The Race Was Won – Rules of the Group Sprint

cosmo — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 14:58:42 +0000

A little TdF preview for you, since the action in the early going is driven largely by the sprinters, and we be especially tightly scrutinized after the tremendous crash at the Tour de Suisse.

The UCI’s rules on what it is and isn’t ok to do in a sprint are both poorly-written, and enforced in a less-than-literal fashion. Drawing on some notable sprint rulings of the past decade, this How The Race Was Won examines exactly what you can and can’t get away with in the final rush to the line.

[right-click for iTunes-compatible download, tap for iPad/iPhone]

The Luckiest Man in the Peloton

cosmo — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 17:45:00 +0000

I’ve been doing a little video work on some sprinting footage ahead of the Tour de France. I’ve looked through the Cavendish crash more times than I care to remember, but I still cannot get over the break Juan Antonio Flecha catches as the race just dissolves in front of him.

Here’s a quick video analysis to brighten up your Friday:

(right-click for iTunes download, tap for iPod/iPhone/iPad)

The Cyclocosm Audio Mailbox System

cosmo — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 13:31:44 +0000

Ever since I began the making How The Race Was Won videos, my propensity for mispronunciation has become more and more embarrassing.

In many ways, it’s not my fault—well over 90% of the information I consume on the sport comes from web text, which doesn’t do a great job of conveying linguistic nuance. In the rare instances when I do get access to an Anglophone talking about cycling in English, it’s usually Phil Liggett, who’s been known to maul a surname or two.

But while it’s clear that I’m not the only one screwing things up, I’d like to be the first to make a serious effort to fix the problem. I’ve set up a Google Voice account which will record and make downloadable copies of voice messages.

The next time I bungle a cyclist’s name, a foreign phrase, or a finishing town—or if you’d like to correct a past mistake/make a pre-emptive strike against a future flub—you can call and record your own properly-pronounced version. The number is (646) 801-2010; I’m in the US, so add the +1 for International calls. While the service is free, any normal charges from your carrier will still apply.

Of course, there’s no technical reason to limit this service to pronunciation, so if you’d like to leave a message on another topic, feel free. Keep in mind that the system will record whatever number you call from (though I will do my best to keep that information private), and unless you specify otherwise, I reserve the right to re-use your messages.

How The Race Was Won – Criterium du Dauphine 2010

cosmo — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 15:18:06 +0000

Finally! The race formerly known as Dauphine Libere gets a rundown, focused almost entirely on the L’Alpe du Huez stage. It’s too bad, really—there were some great finishes on the other days, but stage races are tricky to video summarize like this.

[right-click for iTunes-compatible download, tap for iPad/iPhone]

Much of the delay was due to some major changes to production, including a better microphone and higher-quality source material. Ostensibly, the video is from Eurosport, but I think we all know there’s at least one intermediary involved. Still images, freely-licensed when available, are attributed in this list of sources.

Dial-a-Denial, And Why The Game Might Be Up

cosmo — Mon, 24 May 2010 12:42:27 +0000

No public figure in recent memory has been more well-managed under scrutiny than Lance Armstrong. Sure, hero status gives him a leg up, but there’s real brilliance in how his inner circle handles accusations; on every battlefield he’s fought, Armstrong has always made the issue his accusers, and not their accusations. I’ve compiled a fun little chart to illustrate the point:

(click image for larger sizes, buy a wall poster, full list of sources)

Starting at the twelve o’clock position, the Armstrong quotes run clockwise in chronological order, from his 1999 exchange with Christophe Bassons to his lastest barrage against Floyd Landis. Along the bottom of the chart, the deflection intensity is assessed using a points system for anyone interested in actually playing this as a PR game.

Perhaps the best example of The Armstrong Approach came from the ostensibly anonymous and retroactively sampled EPO “positives” from 1999. Armstrong’s response was unbelievably comprehensive, calling into question the journalistic integrity of the investigation, the scientific honesty of the lab, the legal possibility of a positive test under the rules, and even the scientific fundamentals behind the test. Armstrong managed to address every issue—except for whether or not his ’99 samples tested positive for EPO.

In reality, electrophoresis is an extremely reliable lab technique, samples are almost impossible to spike, the rules are clear that a positive test requires A/B sampling, and, at any rate, the inquiry commissioned to suss out any potential penalties had their report leaked in the Dutch press—not that it stopped Armstrong from declaring victory.

However, a great deal of the effectiveness of Armstrong’s strategy has been that it’s played so sweetly in the mainstream, English Language press. After all, plenty of ink—yes, real ink!—has been spilled by Continental publishers in books compiling the allegations against Armstong. Only when it came time to port LA Confidentiel into English did David Walsh find himself drowning in a sea of rejection letters.The Texan’s unassailable public persona is a purely American phenomenon.

And why not? Armstrong’s opponents have been transatlantic adversaries with weird names (“Jean Francois so-and-so”, as Armstrong dubbed a hypothetical lab worker) who are angry an American is so good at “their” race. They’ve relied on complicated-sounding science and byzantine testing procedures. Besides, Armstrong has never tested positive—and the possibility of a false-negative is a media non-starter.

This time, though, things may be different. There’s no tricky science. There are no strange-sounding labs. The primary accuser, Floyd Landis is an American. He’s a guy most of us cheered for, at least for a bit. And while he’s been discredited, that only gives him the ability to be redeemed—a plotline no sportswriter can pass up. And (more on this later) the arguments that he’s got an ax to grind are at best weak, and at worst fabricated.

Finally—and I think most significantly—doping cases from mainstream American sports are starting to appear and get traction. Yes, non-USADA controls are a teenage babysitter posing as a prison guard, but they’ve still managed to nab a naughty child or two. And as any cycling fan can tell you, once you get your head around the idea that one of your heros is a cheat, it’s not too tough to imagine that the rest of them might be too.